Thursday, January 22, 2015

Things have happened in my life that have just left me reeling.

Hello Friends,

You never know where life is going to take you. The last time I posted to my blog (other than my entry to Jess's Orange Peel Quilt-Along) was just a few days after my family 4th of July Celebration. Even my header shows fireworks surrounding my little pink house. Life seemed "normal" then. But, since then, things have happened in my life that have just left me reeling.

My sister-in-law, Kathy's dear mother had died in the spring and I felt her grief since Eva had become a big part of our lives and our traditional 4th of July and Christmas celebrations. I know now that I didn't fully realize the extent of Kathy's grief until August 11, 2014 when the first man that I ever loved passed away. My Daddy. Life has been so difficult with him gone and I had so many questions for God. All the whys just didn't seem to get answered.Then 3 days before Christmas, on December 22, 2014, the most horrible tragedy happened. My nephew found his son, my 17 year old dear great nephew dead. A few days later, on December 29th, our friend Bobby called to tell us that his wife was on life-support after having surgery and was not expected to ever get better. A week later, our life-long friend died. On top of grieving for Eva (Kathy's Mom), now I had Daddy and and a dear, dear nephew, plus my friend to add to what my heart was already feeling. We all hear that God doesn't give us more than we can handle, well, my take on that is that God didn't give me all this. I know that God is good all the time, and I am confident that all 4 of these very special people are now with God.

I never thought about death like I do now. When it was other people's death, it made sense. I don't know what else to say, except that I will forever believe in God and I know that he is looking after us through all of this. I just need to find a place to get started again. I have a beautiful family. I have my wonderful mother, 3 wonderful children, 4 grandsons, a large extended family, many friends throughout the country and you, my blogging friends. I love everyone so much and I pray for them all the time. I trust that they are in good hands with God looking after them and believe that God is going to show me how to get through my sadness, and keep on living. I have so neglected my blog and my blogging friends and and one of the ways I intend to find my "new normal" is by getting back to my sewing machine and my blog. Thanks for bearing with me as I poured my heart out to you and know that you were often in my thoughts during the last 6 months.



14 comments:

sister outlaws said...

Oh Irene! I'm so sorry! I had been wondering about how you were going and thought you were just sick of blogging. The last six months sounds like a nightmare. Grief is such a heaviness in your core. I know it's hard to do anything with that weight in your heart and I also know that one grief compounds another so what you are going through much be terrible. Losing a parent is a huge loss. Someone who has known you all your life. Someone who is part of you. All I can say is to express your grief, be kind to yourself, do simple things that give you strength. I send you all my love through the internet Irene and wish I could give you a big hug xxx

giddy99 said...

"My condolences" just doesn't seem to say enough, but you're right when you say, God is good ALL THE TIME. Blessings and comfort. :)

Needled Mom said...

You have had more than your share of grief these last months. I am sure it is hard to face most days. We know there is a Master plan, but sometimes these things seem so overwhelming. My prayers have been with you, Ida and your families.

It is so nice to see a post from you and look forward to seeing more soon, my friend. Hugs!

Carla said...

Oh dear. I can't imagine your pain. You are right tho. God is still in control. I will be praying for you.

Celtic Thistle said...

So sorry to hear of your trials Irene, your strength in bearing these sad losses is a real testament to your faith.

Mary said...

Things certainly have happened and I am so very sorry for the tragic loss of so many dear to you. Thank you for sharing with us.

Anthea said...

Oh Irene - what terrible sadness has surrounded you for these months - one would be a challenge but so many is quite the Cross. Thank you for sharing such difficulties with us & please know that you & your loved ones are in my prayers & good wishes. Remember that it's ok to have a cr** day sometimes! Your Dad will be so pleased with the family he was part of creating...
Hugs Across The Seas... Anthea xx

Jessica said...

Thinking of you during this very difficult time, Irene. I had wondered where you had been! I hope that you find solace in your sewing machine.

sunny said...

Irene, I'm so sorry you have had to bear so much sadness. Having lost both parents, I can tell you that I miss them every day, but the grief does get easier with time. As others have said, just take it one day and a time, and be kind to yourself. Let me know when you get back up to Virginia!

Josie McRazie said...

Prayers for continued healing for you and your family. One of my favorite songs quotes 'even though I don't know what his plan is I know He'll make beauty from these ashes!'

Astrid said...

Oh Irene, I'm so sorry to hear what you are going through. I've missed your blog posts and I've been wondering if something happened to you. Take your time to grieve, and perhaps it will ease the pain a little bit if you start sewing again. A huge (((bear hug))) from me. You are in my thoughts. Take care!

Sarah Craig said...

Praying for you, friend! {{{{HUGS}}}}

Ranch Wife said...

Dearest Irene - I am so very sorry for your losses. I've missed your posts and simply kept you in prayer. Seems that prayer is always the right answer.May your faith and the love of your family bring you comfort and may you find some peace behind your sewing machine. Continued prayers.

Shannon said...

Irene, I am so sorry that so much has happened to you. I know that our Heavenly Father will help you. I am praying for you.